#apologies...for the length...i rambled....

[misc-obeyme]

About Mammon's slutty angel outfit... What if! Neither the Devildom or the CR deems sexuality in general as a sin Only Asmo's attitude about it

Oh, anon. I'm sure you weren't intending to unlock my Essay Mode, but here we are.

To begin, I feel the need to state that I always felt that neither the Devildom nor the Celestial Realm viewed sexuality as a sin. I realize the term "slut" is often used as an insult, but I was thinking of it as more of a descriptor? I am always pro-slut! Er. Anyway. I suppose a better word could have been revealing? Hopefully this makes sense.

Terminology aside, I feel that the clothing choices of angels are only partly related to whether or not sexuality in general is seen as a sin. I get that in real life it is because people are weird and think that clothes that aren't "modest" are somehow more sexual, but uh... that makes no sense to me personally. Bodies are bodies and I don't consider their exposure to be inherently sexual, so I don't even think about things that way most of the time lol.

I do think there could be an argument made that we don't actually know what either the Devildom or the Celestial Realm consider to be sins apart from the seven avatars of sin. In Asmo's case, the sin is lust, of course. But what is it about lust that is considered sinful? They don't exactly go into detail about this. And there are multiple aspects to the concept of lust.

I think you can interpret all this however you like, of course. But for me personally, the sin of "lust" is more about the endless desire for more than it is about the act of sex itself. This is because I don't think of sex or sexuality as being "sinful" in any way, so it makes sense to me to frame it that way. But that's just me.

I do think that the angels having such revealing outfits does already imply that the Celestial Realm, at the very least, doesn't consider the exposure of one's body as a sin. Is that because the CR is being wholesome about it and they're like bodies are just bodies? Or is it because they don't actually think of sexuality as a sin? We have no concrete answer, so you get to choose!

Anyway, I'm sure you weren't anticipating this much rambling from me on this subject, but I do find it a very interesting thing to discuss! I certainly prefer the view that the CR and the Devildom don't have this weird hang up about sex. And I think the game leaves enough of those details out that anyone playing can imagine the rules around such things to be however they like!

[willowbilly]

Your post on Silna’s ethnicity was very interesting! After the end of the show, could Silna have been able to join another group or find the Utkuhikšaliŋmiut? If she wasn’t in exile for the death of the Tuunbaq.

And some more questions (if you don’t mind!) - in a modern AU, what ethnicity do you think Silna would identify as? If she could speak an Inuit language/dialect, which one? Most of the people I know who live around Franklin Expedition related places speak Inuinnaqtun or Natsilingmiutut (which I believe is Utkuhikhalik, from Gjoa Haven) but I know next to nothing about linguistics.

Prefacing this with the caveat that these are all merely the opinions and cultural understandings of a white non-Native person from Alaska. Much of this more specific ethnographic and linguistic info is from Knud Rasmussen, Jean Briggs, Alana Johns, Joke Schuit, the Interviewing Inuit Elders series from Nunavut Arctic College, the Ikajuqtigiit Society's Natchilingmiut Uqauhingit, tusaalanga.ca, and the few years I've had of Iñupiatun lessons. I am by no means an expert! 

If Silna were to reconcile with Tuunbaq's spirit after its death, then her exile might be lifted because her shamanism would no longer be an uncontrolled threat to those around her. But that's just me desperately postulating; perhaps Tuunbaq's death itself imposes a lifelong spiritual quarantine upon any person in its proximity. I don't know the precise taboos at work, but the application of traditional taboos was most strict around occasions of birth and death. Adhering to spiritual prohibitions, such as observing a set period of isolation, was believed to help avert misfortune and illness. 

But were she not a danger to people, Silna absolutely could join the Utkuhikšaliŋmiut! Though hostilities with Natchiliŋmiut and Iluilirmiut are said to have contributed to movement of Ugřuliŋmiut southward, and while kin endogamy was preferred, intermarriage between neighboring Inuit groups was relatively commonplace, and migration already obligatory. Inuit in the region were mostly patrilocal nomads: women were more likely to marry out due to typically not needing as intimate a familiarity with their family's hunting grounds as men. Warfare also sometimes involved the abduction of wives; the custom of female infanticide especially during times of extreme hardship resulted in an unequal ratio of men to women. Which is to say that Silna, as a probable Ugřuliŋmiutaq, might join or be joined with any Inuit group in reach. 

Ugřuliŋmiut emigrants are known to have become Utkuhikšaliŋmiut, Hanniŋajurmiut, and Ualiakliit, all of whose subdialects are labeled Utkuhikhalik. The Ualiakliit might speak what is a variety of Hanniŋajurmiut subdialect. Speakers were later resettled largely in Uqšuqtuuq (Gjoa Haven), Talurřuaq (Taloyoak), and Qamani’tuaq (Baker Lake), influencing the Natchilik, Arviligřuaq, and other dialects likewise pushed into the same settlements. Out of the Natsilingmiutut varieties, Utkuhikšalik language is most distinct from Natchilik and Arviligřuaq, with some lexical and phonological differences. Inuinnaqtun is very closely related, and is also now spoken in Uqhuqtuuq! 

Either Utkuhikšaliŋmiutut, Natchiliŋmiutut proper, or Arviligjuarmiutut would make obvious sense for a modern Silna to speak, and if her family now or then is made of speakers from multiple dialects she'd quite likely be able to codeswitch between those dialects. And nearby or coexisting dialects such as Inuinnaqtun make sense too! The more recent the AU, the more one can probably cast other, farther-away Inuit as Silna's family, given a believable enough backstory (though I do suggest that one keep some direct connection between her and the Qitirmiut region, as for instance still having her father or a direct ancestor be an Inuk from Uqšuqtuuq). 

The +miut postbase is also used in more than ethnonyms, because it is tied to dwellership! One may see it lexicalized in other terms as well, such as in aŋutikšat imarmiutat: “sea mammals,” with aŋutikšat “mammals, beasts, wildlife” in apposition with imarmiutat “inhabitants of the water.” The postbase naturally may be attached to the names of modern settlements and other placenames, so nowadays a resident of Gjoa Haven is an Uqšuqtuurmiutaq, a resident of Kugaaruk is a Kuugaarřuŋmiutaq, and so forth. 

Were Silna to join the Utkuhikšaliŋmiut, she would both become and would not really be an Utkuhikšaliŋmiutaq; she'd retain her ethnic identity as an Ugřuliŋmiu even while identified with the local community and its country. The context and situation would inform whether she is defined as an Utkuhikšaliŋmiu or not.

Silna would probably identify as Inuk in a modern AU! Although one could very easily conceive of a modern AU wherein she has heritage from any Inuit-Yuit-Unangan language-speaking people (especially what with the book applying the meaning of Iñupiat, Inuinnait, et cetera: “Real People” to the word Inuit: “People;” the show taking inspiration from Yup’ik mask traditions for Aja's mask; Nive Nielsen being Kalaaleq; etc.). In which case, she'd use the most common ethnonym (Kalaaleq, Iñupiaq, Yupiaq, Yup’ik, Cup’ig, Sugpiaq, Unangax̂, etc.), and if she has inherited multiple tribal affiliations she would formally introduce herself with all of them. These are related but very distinct languages and cultures! 

“Eskimo-Aleut” is the older academic name for the Inuit-Yuit-Unangan language family, with “Eskimo” encompassing the languages of Inuit and Yuit including Sugpiat, and “Aleut” being the language of Unangan, but “Aleut” is the exonym first applied to Native peoples during Russian colonization and is still preferred by both Unangan and Sugpiat/“Alutiit” over the other later exonym “Eskimo.” Some organizations and people, particularly elders in rural Alaska, might still identify themselves in English as “Iñupiaq Eskimo” or “Yupiaq Eskimo,” with acceptance of the exonym in its function as an umbrella ethnonym, but it is more often a slur in Canada and Greenland, and more neutral, precise endonyms are generally preferred, especially by younger or urban people. “Esquimaux” is the older French spelling that may carry slightly less stigma in English. While “Inuit” is sometimes applied to Inuit, Yuit, and Unangan collectively as a replacement umbrella term, it is not totally interchangeable, for it remains an exonym to Yuit and Unangan etc.; though the words Inuk, Iñuk, Yuk, Cuk, and Suk are all clear cognates. “Kalaallit” is the ethnonym for Inuit of Greenland/Kalaallit Nunaat, probably borrowed from a Norse exonym. 

Lowercase “inuit” in Inuit language is the generic noun for all humans (lowercase in Latin orthography, whereas syllabics have no upper/lowercase distinction). An “inuk” is also the yolk of an egg, or the resident spirit of something such as a natural feature, e.g. of siḷa, sila, hila: the air, weather, atmosphere. Iñupiatun for “the resident spirit of the air” is siḷam iñua; the Terror novel appropriates this phrase with unconventional orthography for Silna's group name: “sixam ieua,” but the “spirit-governor-of-the-sky” is literally of the air, its resident spirit. Siḷam is in the singular relative noun case: “of the air” or “the air's.” Iñua is the absolutive noun iñuk with the singular-to-singular possessive noun ending: “its resident spirit.” Hilap inua is the same spirit as the one whose Inuktut proper name is Naarjuk or Naarřuk, who may also be referred to by residence alone: Sila or Hila. These three concepts refer in fact to the same spiritual figure, whereas they are misrepresented in the book as being separate from each other. None are to my knowledge an actual ethnonym, though Naarřuk, Hila, etc. are indeed anthroponyms. Do not listen to Dan Simmons. 

“Indian” historically was and is not an English ethnonym usually applied to Inuit, Yupiit, Sugpiat, or Unangan peoples, but is an official legal term that is identified with other Native nations of Alaska. It may also be used as a slur, but many people still self-identify with this word, particularly as its own umbrella. “First Nations” is the main Canadian term, with “Native American” being more U.S. American. The modern ethnonym “Tinaaq” was borrowed into the Iñuit language from the Dené language endonym “Dena,” as the old Iñuit language term means “one that has or has the quality of or association with louse eggs” and is therefore considered offensive. 

For those in Alaska the preferred English umbrella ethnonym is “Alaska Native” (applied to all Native peoples of Alaska, listed alongside “American Indian” on the census) as well as simply “Native.” I don't know enough about Russia, Canada, and Greenland to speak on preferred terminology there, other than that “Indigenous” is broadly accepted as a general term. Should Silna in one's modern AU have friends or family who are of another, non-Inuit-Yuit-Unangan Indigenous nation, be sure to do one's research on/take into account the relevant histories, intercultural relationships, attitudes, and experiences of whom one is representing, as one ought to best do anyway. Of course, multiethnic/multiracial people will face specific sets of circumstances. 

If one's modern AU does expand or change Silna's ethnicity so that she grows up, say, Yup’ik in Alaska, remember that the language landscape will be different depending on the area and its history, e.g. with Moravian missionaries in much of that area having learned and translated into Yugtun as opposed to having suppressed it, there was a somewhat higher level of postcolonial Native language preservation than elsewhere in the state. The impacts of cultural assimilation and boarding/residential schools were widespread and considerable, vary a bit in different places, and if Silna or her parents were fostered or adopted by non-Native people it is very unlikely she would be a first-language speaker/signer of her heritage language(s). English also now dominates as the lingua franca even when it is not already instilled as a first language for many. Other major colonial languages across the larger region include Russian, French, Danish, and ASL. 

I operate on the basis of my headcanon that Silna's father, Aja, and therefore Silna, must have known a local variety of Inuit Sign Language, since it would be indispensable for a person whose tongue is removed, presuming a sign language is still permitted to them. The novel has Silna and her family using a sign language of string figures. This is inconvenient and unrealistic in that using string figures as morphemes ideally requires a string and is more tedious; the spirit of the string games, Tuutaŋŋuarřuk (who makes string figures with his own intestines), is said to attack those who want to play too much; and there is already a preexisting normal sign language. While the language's history is not well-known, it is thought to have developed among Deaf Inuit, from and with the signs that hunters used to coordinate and that facilitated the communication between speakers of different Inuktut dialects as for instance during trade relations; it is signed by both Deaf and hearing Inuit. The absolute certainty of this headcanon of mine decreases for a modern AU, since modern schooling has so stifled Native languages and ensured that most Deaf/HoH Inuit learn American Sign Language (ASL) and Manually Coded English (MCE); ISL or Inuit Uukturausingit (IUR) is thus very endangered today (estimated <40 monolingual signers). IUR is, however, currently attested to be signed in Baker Lake, Rankin Inlet, and Taloyoak, and so Silna's family being signers who are from one of these places is more than plausible! 

It is valuable that one decide Silna's specific heritage and community for one's AU, because this will inform what she speaks and/or signs. In introducing herself to someone nowadays she may say who her parents are and where she's from, or this would simply be integral to the grounded establishment of her character. I don't know if she would use the “Natsilik Inuk” umbrella term for herself in a modern AU; please defer to the opinions that Inuit from the region have about its usage for themselves! But if in use as an umbrella term, it would be in addition to the particular ethnonym(s) inherited from her family. 

Silna in a modern AU being among the many who are struggling against Indigenous language loss would make for one of several meaningful, tragic, yet more prosaic analogs to her canonical speechlessness. She could have Inuktut, IUR, and English as her first languages, and, frustrated to see the loss underway, partakes in revitalization work, or perhaps she is monolingual in a colonial language and is only just beginning to learn her heritage Native language(s) after a difficult, discouraging history. Either way, it depends on how she was raised, on what her community, family, and father passed on to her, and that depends on communal and personal reactions to the traumatic impact of forced cultural assimilation.

[lilacella]

Ok listen, I'm going to expose myself here (why? Who knows.)

Anyways, so when I was a wee little sloth, shipnames were usually just an amalgamation of the characters names. No fancy abstract noun combinations.

Soooo, when I started shipping prongsfoot "prongsfoot" wasn't a common ship name neither was "bambibelle". (I'm not saying noone used these back then but not in the circles I was reading FF in.) It usually just got tagged Sirius/James. So I came up with my very own combination.

And James and Sirius is very hard to combine. But there would have been reasonable options, you know? Jamius, Sames, Jameus,... But NO. My kid self chose:

SirJames.

And I was so proud of this? I made them one of these CD mixtapes and wrote it all over the CD😭

[kafkaoftherubble]

Hi! I've really enjoyed your tags on the reblog of the screencaps of The Believers on my sideblog @nonkunchanon. I was wondering what are your thoughts on Monk Dol's next move now that he's been rejected by Dear, whether he would disrobe or not. And I think Pup will be back for The Believers Season 2 though, since at least according to this interview, it seems like Pup is ready to shave his head again to be Monk Dol. Also do you think Win has any feelings for Dear?

HOLY SHIT. With this ask you've basically allowed me to ramble about The Believers. THANK YOU THANK YOU SADHU X100 Also, Pup has an interview?! And he's ready to be Monk Dol again?!

SADHU X1000. Thank you for linking it, fella appreciator!

Okay. I'll tell you what I think, but you're gonna have to reblog this and tell me what you think too, because I'm also interested in your thoughts!!!

---

Monk Dol's next move

Okay! There are two perspectives I can go for: the showrunners' + actor's, and the character's. Judging from both Thai and international fans' reviews and reception, Monk Dol is a really, really popular character, isn't he (who can blame him)? Popularity usually incentivizes bringing a character back for Season 2, and Pup does seem pretty happy playing the character. All that means there are really good grounds to think he'll return, ahahhaha! I'm with you on this one!

However! From the character's perspective, it's a bit more nuanced, methinks!

I, uh, study Buddhist Philosophy for fun, so I can tell you that the biggest reason why I like Monk Dol is that every single dhamma talk/sermon he gave, as well as his character traits and personality, are aligned with Buddhism. In a show criticizing the commercialization of Thai Buddhism (and its relation with politics), Dol provides an example of what Buddhism "is supposed to be about."

I've been rewatching the series every now and then when I'm free, so I got to re-watch his scenes and Dhamma talks. The teachings are actually legitimately correct. Not even "Pop culture-diluted correct" or "I guess it's a correct interpretation," but befitting the dhamma as espoused in Theravadin Buddhism, which Thai Buddhism falls under.

That means Monk Dol's themes and character arc are deliberately woven with Buddhist philosophy, including concepts like anicca ("impermanence") and nekkhamma ("renunciation; letting go"). This makes it harder to write him back into Season 2 without hurting a little of the themes he's supposed to represent, you see?

In his letter to Dear, he talked about how, thanks to his love and attachment for Dear, he realized that "there are many more things about myself that I need to train on." It's a very Buddhist sentiment (the Buddha's last word before death/parinibbana was, reportedly, "strive diligently." You might also remember one of Dol's Dhamma Talks on the importance of self-effort over superstitious reliance on holy objects and the Buddha; it was his first talk since joining Wat Phummaram).

The way he exited the story was him practicing nekkhamma and the sort of "love" he talked about earlier. He also alluded to their interaction as remnants of their past kamma (this is how it's spelled in Pali; it's "karma" in Sanskrit) influencing their current lives.

Just a brief explanation in case you don't understand the "kamma" thing! In a supernatural reading of kamma, the effects of your actions in your past lives with other people can bring over to your current life. Therefore, Dol was saying that him falling in love with Dear/Dear unintentionally "charmed" him was no fault of himself nor Dear, but simply the effects of their collective kamma. He merely saw his experience—of falling in love and being rejected; of being conned and used because of said love; the general dukkha (suffering) of it all—as a lesson illuminating aspects of himself that he should overcome.

Dol recognized that he needed to let go of his attachment to Dear as she never belonged to him; previously, he explained that as part of the Buddhist doctrine of Anattā ("non-self") when he answered Dear's question about love. He also told her not to remember him, which to me, all adds up to him hoping this is it. He's hoping that the effects of their past kamma had burned out.

Now, if they want to continue the Buddhist philosophical theme undergirding Monk Dol's character, then the "good end" will be him not showing up in Season 2 at all. From a storytelling perspective, it makes sense too: his arc has a definite end already.

----

However, I can also imagine ways to pull Monk Dol back into the fold without costing his underlying Buddhist themes. For one, "kamma," to the Buddha, mostly means "action" when it's not "cause-and-effect." While Dol would like to think his kamma with Dear is over, it's also possible that his actions and interactions with Dear—and to an extent, Win and Game—have planted seeds of their own, with their own effects to be reaped. These effects can be explored in Season 2.

Where should he go? He has already exchanged his forest monk lineage for a city monk's, but his idea of Buddhism is embodied in the Thai Forest tradition, not the city ones. Can he return to his original forest temple, though? We saw that he was "punished" by one of the eminent temple monks when Win and Dear were trying to collect sacred ingredients for their amulet.

His changing of lineage was not without consequences, and it's a bit hard to imagine him being accepted back to his original temple easily. Thai Forest Tradition is a lot stricter than other schools in Thailand, and a monk who pivots from one school to another can be seen as wishy-washy, unreliable, lacking in discipline, and rather disgraceful by forest monks.

Hence, I would imagine that he either joins a very remote forest temple far away from Wat Phummaram and the show's central background region... or becomes a solitary monk.

No matter which way he chooses, though, I can imagine him being even more ardent in his practice, and perhaps rather avoidant of female laypeople. Even if he has no intention to discriminate, he might try to overcorrect his previous lapse with Dear by putting a wide berth between himself and other women no matter their intentions. I can also imagine him struggling with the actual process of renunciation, which is never as easy as it might sound. His experience with Dear is going to affect him a lot. Even dreams of her are possible.

And from there, I suppose there are two ways for him to join with the trio's Main Plot. Either he coincidentally gets roped back into their activities, or he deliberately looks out for any news about Dear and her gang because he still cares about her wellbeing.

If Monk Dol takes a more active role, he might gradually come into the line of fire by standing up against this sort of commercialized Buddhism. He might also try to help Dear (plus Win and Game; it's more understated, but Dol also cares about those two. We see it in the interrogation scene) to get out of their quandary.

I think Dol will be quite punished for his actions, though. As in, he'll suffer quite a bit. Not sure if he might die, per se, but I'll suspect something worse than what he got in Season 1. I hope he doesn't die, but that's only because I'm personally no fan of martyr tropes, ahahha!

There are also significant odds that Dol will manage to change Dear and Game's hearts through his actions and counsel once he rejoins the trio in the Main Plot. It will be harder to reach Win, I assume, because Win is the least receptive and warmed up to religions, and his attitude toward Buddhism has been very irreverent. Throughout Season 1, Win's attitude toward Monk Dol has been that of a tech bro looking at his most valuable asset.

Nonetheless, Dear and Game, being Win's friends, can bridge that gap along with Dol and Win's mother. Philosophically, it will exemplify paṭiccasamuppāda, "dependent co-arising"—causes are interdependent with one another as people are also interdependent with one another. Whether that's enough to change their fate in Season 2 is a whole 'nother thing!

That's as far as I can hypothesize about Monk Dol! I'll expect even more Buddhist-flavored character study, a psychological/philosophical arc, and if Monk Dol inclines, a more active counter-power to the corruptive political forces that have claimed Dear, Game, and Win.

Does Win Like Dear?

It's hard to say. I have to put out a disclaimer that I'm terrible at understanding human emotions and especially love because I... personally cannot feel it nor understand it! I honestly didn't even realize that Dol likes Dear until the Repentance Ritual!

I lean toward thinking Win doesn't love Dear or like her the way she—or us normal folks—hopes for a healthy romantic relationship. Win is a pragmatist who's pretty obsessed with "winning." He has a very strong ego; he wouldn't even talk to Game after the amulet business was booming, almost as if he's hoping to see Game climb back to him and apologize for being wrong and doubting him. He also saw no problem using Dear as an unwitting honeypot trap to control Monk Dol, despite Dear being someone who likes him.

I especially love the flashback scene to Dear's mother's passing. You can see Win's character in detail there; he engaged with Dear on a surface level, thinking it's enough to comfort her by telling her facts about death and failing to realize what she actually needed until Dear requested it upfront (it also served as a great contrast to Win's foil: Monk Dol interacts with other people differently. Dol always tries to address the underlying questions, takes time to listen, and only gives answers he believes are beneficial and helpful. He's like this to Monk Ekechai and even the cop who looks like fucking Robert Downy Jr.).

Win exhibited very little empathy for other people. Remember how he didn't help a granny with her bag until he realized he could talk to her while they walked together, so he could fish out any potential bait to lure Monk Dol into their scheme? If I were to describe this particular aspect of Win's character from a Buddhist perspective, I'd say he displays the near enemy of the concept of mettā, "friendliness." He is capable of caring about people only from an explicitly egocentric view, instead of caring for others for their own sake.

This hinders whatever he could have had with Dear, I think. Even if these two get together romantically, I honestly don't think it will be a rewarding relationship to Dear at all. Win is callous to everyone and is more obsessed with feeding his ego through perceived victories against the odds than anything else.

However, I don't actually think Win is incapable of caring about Dear, Game, or anyone else. I can't point fingers and tut-tut Win when I myself am also really low on empathy. In fact, from my own experience, I know that low empathy doesn't preclude apathy or an immutable lack of care. You can even catch a glimpse of Win's capacity for care in how he treated his cat.

Win also clearly suffers from trauma related to his father's disappearance. In true Buddhist fashion, there is an emphasis on cause-and-effect (i.e. kamma) in the show, telling us that he's the way he is precisely because of his experiences growing up.

We can also use his most obvious show of care as a comparison. Win is fiercely devoted to his mom and loves her deeply, and yet he's also dismissive of her thoughts, feelings, and sentimental offers to deepen their relationship. His care for her only showed when his mom was directly threatened, or when he believed his image in his mother's heart was close to being destroyed.

I think this allows the audience a bit of insight into how Win treats his loved one; he's also dismissive of Dear's feelings, thoughts, and needs... and yet that doesn't mean he doesn't care about her. There were times when he clearly cared and relied on her as a friend; he tried to call her near the end of Season 1 when he was feeling emotionally vulnerable as he was undergoing an onset of PTSD, for example.

Can that platonic care become a base for romance? I don't know. But to me, it really shows us that none of the trio are "evil," unlike what Cop RDJ insisted while interrogating Monk Dol—not even Win. In true Buddhist fashion, Win was just deluded ("moha," one of the Three Poisons) and merely needed more guidance.

Since his past is coming into the spotlight at the end of Season 1, going into Season 2, I think Win's character arc has only just begun. Dear and Game will play big roles in that as his friends and confidants, for sure, but this is also where Monk Dol's role in Season 2 can fit (as stated above).

I can't say if Win will end up falling in love with Dear for real at the end of S2 since it's not gonna be my personal subject of interest. But I'll love to see Win's striving in Season 2. As a certain monk says in his letter, I sure hope Win can also be free from his suffering, ahhahah!

Thank you for reading my ramble!

[oynonrings]

anxiety is a hell of a drug. why do i keep apologizing for writing smutty responses to smutty asks on my smutty blog that people followed from my smutty fanfiction.

[circuscursed]

"Oh... Ragatha... ahaha, fancy seeing you here..."

Pomni fumbles on her words as she greets the rag doll - the human, really, though it's sometimes hard to remember - before her. What is she supposed to say? She's been dreading talking to her one-on-one like this, though to be fair, there isn't much that she hasn't been dreading, lately.

It feels like she's constantly on the verge of snapping, her chest feeling tight and a phantom nausea overtaking her senses - which for the record, doesn't even make sense, since she isn't in a human body anymore! She doesn't know if she wants to cry or scream or what, but every moment is a struggle not to fall apart - there will be a way out, she tells herself, even though she knows she's lying, because if she gives up, then...

...Well. Back to the matter at hand...!!

"You know, I just wanted to say, ah..." she can't seem to get out the words. She has to apologize, she knows that, and she does feel guilty, it's just... well, no-one can blame Pomni for trying to get out of here, right? That exit door might've been her only chance, and, and...!

"I'm... really sorry, about before. You know, when I, uh. Left you. Again." Great, it sounds even worse when she says it aloud. "I didn't mean to... I mean, I'm just- really glad you're okay!"

@ragsdolly ( starter! )

[mischiefxmanagcd]

Death. So much death. Miranda was becoming convinced that this place, this specific hospital, was cursed somehow. The fact she was still standing was a miracle in and of itself. She should’ve died the day Gary Clark came into the hospital; was sure she would have if not for lying about being a nurse; something that still haunted her to this day. And now this. A plane crash, taking down so many of their doctors. Not just through death, but injuries, trauma... it was too much. How many more tragedies could the doctors at this hospital withstand?

Her interns - the interns she had sworn meant nothing to her, they were just the people she taught - were all dispatched in their own ways. Izzie had left; Cristina moved away from Seattle; Meredith was barely recovered from the crash; George was in the freaking Army; and Alex was, well, Alex. 

Standing at the nurse’s desk, not making heads nor tails of the chart that was in her hands, Bailey’s mind kept going to different places. Had she failed her interns somehow? Had she not done enough to prepare them for the world? None of what happened was her fault of course but it sure as hell felt that way. Shaking her head to clear her thoughts, she picked up the chart she was looking at, preparing to give a consult in the pit.

That was until she happened to look at the doors as they opened and the sight of a familiar yet aged face appeared in them and she dropped everything she was holding and without realizing what was happening was practically running towards the person, throwing her arms around them in a hug that threatened to crush bones.

“George O’Malley, as I live and breathe,” she managed to say, forcing back tears. “It’s damn good to see you.”  // @mcbastardd

[1800duckhotline]

madonna 2, 5, 9, 10, 12, 15, 16 !!!

GET TO KNOW THE OC ASKS

YAYY Madonna time!

Sorry it took me a bit to get to this. I've been busy but here we go. Madonna lore just for you. You know the drill, this is gonna get long.

2. Is your OC a loner or a social butterfly? Are they satisfied with how they come across to other people?

Madonna is like if an extrovert and an introvert had a baby (unfunny joke but it explains sort of). Due to her past job as a pharmacist and having been part of a corporate environment, being a social butterfly was more or less a requisite, which means through the years she's built up a "social stamina" strong enough to withstand social events that last well over 3 hours. This carries over as Kindred, however, her unlife also warrants a very much welcomed sense of tranquility since she decides when she wants to be social, usually in the context of feeding from willing blood dolls she meets in clubs or with fellow vampires she has an alliance with.

I think you could categorize Madonna as an extroverted introvert, since she definitely treasures her time alone and enjoys distancing herself from socializing for the sake of her own interests.

5. Does your OC have a signature weapon and/or attack? How long did they train to master it?

As Tremere, Madonna has a vast array of Thaumaturgy skills that can aid her in battle - her favorite spell to use is Blood Theft as it is extremely convenient in situations where a lot of spells need to be cast. That said, she tends to make sure she uses as less Thaumaturgy as possible in context where the supernatural isn't involved - and thus relies on her marksmanship skills, which are fairly impressive.

She didn't know a lick of fighting before becoming kindred, so go figure - she has always been a fast learner, so it no doubt helped her in this case.

9. Is your OC laid back or do they thrive on drama? What role do they play in their group of friends/associates?

Madonna is 35 years old in body and spirit and to be fair, she is a woman with a job, even if undead, so she really does not care about drama at all. She's got other shit to do!

Even before the embrace she kept the same kind of attitude whenever it came to her associates at work and outside; people generally regarded her as the aloof cool girl that wouldn't be phased by anything... when, truthfully, Madonna just prefers minding her own business rather than gossip... Like, unless the gossip is necessary for her to complete an important task, she tends to skip it entirely.

10. Is your OC sentimental or pragmatic? Do they keep mementos or only what they need to survive? Have they always been this way or did something happen to make them change?

Before the embrace, Madonna used to be extremely pragmatic. Not entirely to the point of lacking any whatsoever sentimentality but a corporate job will do that to you - it was sucking away at any energy she could dedicate to her feelings, and it really showed in how she behaved whenever something factually exciting or mortifying happened (not necessarily to her, but something like maybe one of her co-workers having a baby, or one of them losing a family member... she used to react very matter-of-factly, not out of malice but because she didn't really have it in her to commit to her full emotions). Her job tended to come first and it was also something of a problem in her familial life, as before becoming a corporate pharmacist she used to be very family-oriented, that with having 3 siblings and elderly parents.

Becoming Kindred turned her way more sentimental. Free of the shackles of her old job, Madonna regained the range of emotions she'd closed herself away from for about the last decade or so... which makes for some fun situations where she reacts immaturely for her age, but makes complete sense when you consider that for her this is like a second adolescence!

Unfortunately, though, even though she truly desires it, she feels like she cannot go back to connect with her family as Kindred. She fears of putting their lives at risk, and especially of compromising the Masquerade since some of the changes that come with being Tremere wouldn't go unnoticed by her family; not to say that they are fairly religious people at heart, and she doesn't wish to destroy the image they have of her as a darling hard-working angel who can do no wrong. This makes her sad, but this is where her pragmatism comes in clutch and reassures her there is simply no way to go around this. Which isn't wrong... though there could be ways, if she put her mind to it!

12. Is your OC cynical or optimistic? Who or what shaped their outlook on life?

I would say she's right inbetween, with a healthy sway towards optimistic. You would think studying medicine would've made her more cynical, which it did at the time, but as a vampire she found things much less grim than she thought they were before.

In general she's always been taught by her family not to look at things with rose-tinted glasses, and it is something she stood by for most of her human life. While they didn't outright encourage her to look at things negatively, they tried to remind her to be objective when it came to most things, especially as she studied medicine. Desmond somewhat reminds her of them in that way, with her special interests revolving around algorithms, mathematics and chess; and while Madonna doesn't think this belief system is wrong, she's found now that being a little more optimistic and carefree never hurts as long as you don't slip into excessive naiveté.

15. What places hold significant meaning or memories for your OC? Do they have a positive or negative association with those places?

So I haven't gone in exact detail in my exploration of Madonna's past yet, though I know she's based in LA originally (as she was made for the VTMB setting), and I would say that besides obvious important places she's likely been with with her family, a specific place that holds significant importance to her as Kindred is probably Confession, the club, because that is where she started seeing Desmond and becoming acquainted with her. They may have differing opinions on some stuff but, well, they kind of still have somewhat of a 'whirlind' kind of romance-not-romance going on, so it's definitely a positive association... LOL

16. How does your OC make money? Do they have a respectible profession or work a series of odd jobs? Are they a criminal? Or do they get creative in the pursuit of coin?

I wouldn't say Madonna is a criminal but the legality of some of her operations as an underground pharmacist can be dubious at best. She sells black market pharmaceutical drugs and also substances that aren't for the usual... public use. She also sells concoctions she came up with for other Kindred, as a way to make use of her Thaumaturgy in a similar context to her old pharmaceutical job. So it's... kind of... shady but not straight-up illegal most of the time?

Desmond 100% helps her keep a front so she doesn't have to deal with most legalities even though her chantry likely prohibited her from interacting with Madonna too much (this is Desmond we're talking about though... she has many of her fingers in various different pies).

[numberforaname]

@untilthcyrot asked: [ HIDE ] ( lila )

Diego didn’t see it coming. One second, he was focused, all his attention locked onto his surroundings, and the next, a force slammed into him from the side, sending him sprawling to the ground. His immediate reaction was irritation, his temper flaring as he twisted beneath the weight pressing him down. Without thinking, Diego’s reflexes kicked in, his body automatically rolling to the side to protect himself. As he moved, his hand shot to his belt, fingers closing around the hilt of his knife in a flash. He was ready to strike, his mind on high alert, every nerve on edge. But just as he was about to lunge, he caught a glimpse of who had tackled him—Lila. The recognition hit him like a cold splash of water, and he froze, the knife hovering mid-air.

His breath came in sharp, controlled bursts as he quickly processed what had just happened. For a split second, he could still feel the anger, the instinctive irritation that always came with being ambushed, but it was rapidly giving way to something else as he noticed the tension in her posture. She wasn’t playing around. There was a real threat, and she had thrown herself on him to keep him out of sight.

Diego cursed under his breath, lowering the knife but not fully sheathing it, just in case. His muscles remained coiled, ready for whatever might come next, but his mind was already racing to understand the situation.

“Lila, what the hell?” he hissed, voice low but laced with that familiar edge of irritation. The question wasn’t just about why she tackled him—though that was definitely part of it—but also about the unseen danger she was reacting to. Even in a situation like this, his instincts screamed at him to take control, to act, but he forced himself to stay still, trusting her judgment for the moment.

He glanced around, realizing now that she had pushed him down for a reason, his mind racing to catch up. His body tensed, ready to spring into action, but he knew better than to act without understanding the situation. His voice dropped to a harsh whisper, the edge of anger still there, but now laced with concern “What the fuck is going on?”

[kurooh]

QUICKIES ! — HAIKYUU

⊹₊˚. he thinks the rush and risk of a quickie with you is the best feeling ever.

⟡ feat. timeskip! miya atsumu, bokuto kōtarō, iwaizumi hajime, kuroo tetsurō.

⟡ warnings: 18+ content (mdni), f! reader, creampies, oral sex [m&f], cum swallowing, wall sex, public sex & exhibitionism, degradation, fingering, squirting, sex against a window, not proofread !!

⟡ xoxo, juno: my heart goes out to the neglected haikyuu fans on my blog. this is for you <3

— MIYA ATSUMU.

“tsumu,” you pant, head falling back into the lockers behind you with a small thud that’s unheard over the sound of skin against skin.

you’re balancing on one jelly-like leg, back pressed into the lockers, the other leg hanging on his arm, toes curling. “oh, right there, tsumu, please,” a breathy whimper leaves your parted lips, and he angles his hips slightly, snapping his cock into you harder. each thrust punches the air out of your lungs, and atsumu knows he won’t be able to last much longer if you keep clenching like this, your pretty face scrunched with pleasure from him.

“fuck, babe— ughhh, yer so pretty like this..” he buries his face in your neck, the pace of his hips becoming unsteady and erratic as he gets closer and closer to coming undone inside you. in the not so far distance, you hear talking and laughing, but ignore it.

your pussy throbs, gummy walls sucking him deep, and he groans out your name, pressing you harder into the lockers. “mmmh, ‘m gonna cum, where d’ya—”

“inside, want it in me,” you cut him off with a whiny plea, “want it dripping out while i watch the game.”

your hand races to press into the small of his back, in an attempt to make sure he doesn’t pull away or out. with a grumble of your name that makes his chest shake, he cums inside of you, just as a door opens nearby.

“tsumu,” you whisper in a panic when he doesn’t make any move to pull out after a few seconds, effectively plugging you full of his cum, “we have to get dressed for your game, y-your friends—”

“nah,” atsumu huffs, staring at your flexing pussy; his cum drips from you, slipping down your thighs mesmerizingly. he practically has hearts in his eyes looking up and down your body.

“i think we’re a little early, kiyoomi,” hinata’s bright voice is suddenly a few rows of lockers away.

“prep before a game is most important,” sakusa replies sternly, “practice and a shower before always guarantees a win, shōyo.”

atsumu’s already in his shorts, helping you pull on an msby jersey, stamped with his number on the back. his cum drips from your cunt as you quickly move past his teammates with a wave, mumbling a dumb excuse as you race out the door.

“atsumu,” sakusa pulls on his mask almost immediately, his guard up. “surely you noticed your girlfriend wearing the jersey backwards.”

— BOKUTO KŌTARŌ.

“you’re gonna win, kou, i promise,” you interrupt your boyfriend’s enthusiastic and nervous rambling, lips trailing over his inner thighs.

“i-i know, but this game is important!” he emphasizes, swallowing thickly as your fingers hook into the waistband of his shorts and boxers. the clothing slides down his thighs, settling at his knees, and you inch closer to his cock �� rock hard, hot to the touch, tip sticky with precum.

bokuto chokes out a hushed groan, tangling his fingers in your hair and cupping the back of your head the second you take him into your mouth. he helps you take his entire length into your mouth, spurring you on with his whines and mumbled curses.

“b-baby, fuck, you’re so perfect, ughhh—”

you choke when you finally make it all the way down to his base, your nose practically touching the coarse hair covering his pelvis. eager hands begin to guide you up and down, his tip hitting the back of your throat as you move. bokuto gasps out a string of hazy apologies when he heard you gag particularly hard, but he doesn’t stop— instead, he cups the back of your head firmly and fucks up into your mouth, the movement of his hips sloppy.

“y-you wan’ me to win, right?” his head drops back, the creaky sounds of the locker room bench growing louder beneath him. with your one of your hands positioned on the wood for support, you feel the bench shaking hard.

you nod, your eyes moving from his abs up to his scrunched face; he’s biting down on his bottom lip, worrying it between his teeth, his golden eyes half lidded and teary.

it’s almost filthy, the way bokuto rises off the bench, pushing you away from him before cupping the back of your head— he draws his hips back, leaving his tip in your mouth, then slams all the way inside.

tears spring to your eyes at the force, and you only move closer to him to allow him to use your mouth, or his ‘good luck charm’ before games.

“hahhh, that’s right, take it just like that,” bokuto grunts, “god, you’re gonna make me cum.”

heat rushes through your body and pools in your pelvis, wetting your panties at his words; his well muscled chest, gleaming with sweat, rises and falls rapidly as he pants. as his orgasm approaches, his thighs and abs tense as he buries himself deep in your throat, pulling you close to his pelvis.

his cock thickens on your tongue, throbbing as he finally fills up your throat with his cum; still sensitive, he whimpers as you swallow around him. slowly, bokuto pulls out of your mouth, his cock still hard.

he quickly pulls up his shorts, tugs you to your feet, and gives you a tight hug. “i’m gonna win today, and it’s all cause of you!” he mumbles excitedly into your neck.

“sounds good, kou,” you laugh, rubbing his back. “after the game, meet me back in the locker room, ‘kay?”

— IWAIZUMI HAJIME.

“mmmh, princess— loosen up a little for me, can barely move,” hajime hisses into your ear, spreading your thighs a little wider with his free hand. he curls his fingers inside you, prodding at your sweet spot and stretching out your tight pussy with their girth.

your nails press crescents into his strong shoulders through his shirt as you hold him for support in humping yourself onto his fingers. “t-thank you, haji, i needed this, ah!” your voice cracks when he starts to scissor his fingers in and out of you at an unforgiving pace.

“‘course, baby..” he leans in for a chaste kiss, his olive eyes closing as his lips touch yours.

despite being a hardass with his team, shouting and sometimes even swearing at them, hajime would always be gentle and loving with you all the time. often, you are his outlet when it comes to letting off steam — either through soft or rougher sex.

although he’s disciplined and strong willed, he always melts when you cling to him, eyes shining as you take his hand in yours, guiding him inside your shorts to feel your damp panties. “need you, haji,” was all you’d said earlier, and then he had you on his lap with his big fingers buried in your cunt, the two of you tucked away beneath the bleachers of the gym, right before practice starts. hajime always has time for you.

“o-oh, hajime!” you cry, pushing your face into his chest, feeling the muscle beneath his fitted shirt, “i’m c-cumming, ‘m—”

your hips jerk backwards, his fingers slipping out of you, and your face burns as you squirt all over his lap, his hands, and yourself. a sharp gasp leaves you when you realize you’ve soaked him and his clothes, right before practice.

“h-hajime, i’m so sorry, i—”

he cuts you off by grabbing your chin firmly, tugging you to look at him. “don’t be, babygirl,” he lets you go and slowly starts to slide you off his lap, gesturing for you to stand up.

“i just wanted to make you cum, it’s okay, i still have some time to change,” he murmurs, getting on his knees and wasting the changing time; his tongue slides over your wet inner thighs, and he starts to lick up your cum.

your hands tangle in his dark hair, and you pull him closer to your dripping pussy, eyes rolling back when he presses a wet kiss to your clit.

— KUROO TETSURŌ.

“wow, couldn’t even wait till my lunch break, huh? w-what—shit, so tight—a slut.”

kuroo’s words are shaky, grunted out from above you as he fucks you, bent over with your palms pressed against the window. the glass is smeared with the combination of perspiration and your scented lotion that makes him go insane, the one that has him grabbing you all over.

“harder, tetsu..” you whisper, toes curling in your socks; your short skirt is flipped up, panties wet and pulled to the side. he’s supposed to be leaving his office for a meeting in the next 5 minutes, but when you showed up all pretty and flashed him just a little, he couldn’t resist.

the door wasn’t even closed, and here he was pushing his cock inside you and sliding his large hands under your shirt to grab at your tits.

“you like me fuckin’ you with the door open, right in front of the window, hm? fucking you just like a whore, baby.”

your puffy cunt clenches hard around his cock, and your head falls forward with a needy mewl, drinking in the sight of kuroo’s balls smacking into your clit, his cock pounding in and out of you.

“oh?” he slaps your ass, drawing a whimper from your lips that has him gritting his teeth and tossing his head back, “you like being called a whore, don’t you? you like me using your—ughhh, fuck!—s-slutty pussy like this, yeah?”

“yes, tetsu, god yes,” you keen, hands sliding down the glass as your eyes roll back and your back arches for him, “don’t stop don’t stop, please—”

you hope kuroo will be able to cum before his assistant comes by to remind him of the meeting that’s only a few minutes away — you hear her pushing away from her desk to come to his office, and you can’t find it in yourself to care or be any quieter.

[serenanymph]

Happy blorbo blursday! Your characters get to talk to themselves from five years ago – what would they say?

Happy blorbo blursday!! Oooh I love this one prepare for an extremely long essay bcuz I have no self-control. Just gonna answer for Crys because it is already way too long.

Okay, so honestly, with Crys being Crys, he'd be really secretive and cautious about what to tell his younger self, worries about potential ripple effects and all that. If he figured out all the risks and everything though he'd likely just offer practical advice that will help his younger self survive. A suggestion to pick up the bow, to try joining the village hunting party when he's old enough, to explore the forest till he knows it like the back of his hand, the fact that there's a loose floorboard under his bed where he can hide supplies, etc.

An honest, heartfelt message would be really hard for him because Crys Averwell is Bad At Feelings, and at 11 years old, his younger self is kind of stuck in that transitional phase - he hasn't lost all his childhood innocence yet but he's growing more and more cynical. So anything older Crys says would probably not be all that comforting.

In the end though he'd still quietly hug his younger self and tell him "You're going to survive this and things are going to get better, even if it's hard to believe right now." Not exactly helpful, and considering he's still struggling now he might not even be in a position to say this - but still. It's something, and that has to be better than nothing.

[romanticintheory]

Hello!!!! I was wondering if you could write an angst with Ghost/Simon where the reader was too clingy after having a bad day and he lashed out on her but he didn't think anything of it because the next day the reader was acting normal. He only noticed after a few weeks when reader became more distant and quiet. Feel free to ignore if it's too weird or you don't like it!!! ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

this one is dedicated to all the ones who were hurt and never got that apology. hope this alleviates the pain.

simon "ghost" riley x gn!reader || masterlist || request rules

-there was no one specific reason as to why today turned out to be a bad day. it just was.

-from accidentally burning yourself trying to make breakfast after waking up late to having to deal with the most insufferable customers, it just wasn't your day today.

-but it was okay, because you had simon to return to when everything was said and done.

-the frown on your face immediately softens the moment you see him walk through the door to your shared home. as soon as he pulls his mask and boots off, you make your way toward him and engulf him in a tight hug.

-you are painfully (but understandably) unaware of the thin veil of his patience and the frustration that had been brewing within him in the past few hours. he half-heartedly returns the embrace.

-"how was your day, si?" you ask him gently.

-"fine," he responds shortly, hoping there isn't more to the conversation.

-even after you pull away from him, you trail behind him as he moves around the house. this wasn't irregular behavior from either of you. simon wasn't usually the most talkative person in the room, anyway, but he loved to hear your voice. that was one of the things he loved about the two of you together; you filled the space he couldn't.

-today, though, was different. he was pissed off at all different kinds of people. for some reason, couldn't bring himself to tell you that he was having a bad day and needed some space, especially because it was evident you were having a bad one yourself.

-so when he turned on his heel after listening to your rambles for as much as he could take and lashed out at you, he tried not to think about the unbearable amount of guilt seeping into his veins.

-"would you just stop clinging to me for five minutes? god, 's like i can't get away from you or your constant fucking talking!"

-you had heard stories, mostly from simon, about the kind of man he could be when pushed to his limit. mostly, it was of violent, physical acts when it came to work or protecting the ones he loved. other times, he would tell you about when he'd lash out at others just like he did to you, now, and he always told it to you with a quiet fear. there was an unspoken meaning to him telling you about the times he's acted out: i don't want to do the same to you. i don't want to hurt you.

-but here he was, towering over you with a coldness in his eyes and a dryness in his throat from the sheer volume of his words.

-averting your gaze from his, you let out a meek, "'m sorry," and watch as he slams the door in front of your face.

-when he slinks into bed next to your sleeping form later that night, ridden with shame and guilt, he misses the tear-stained face hidden from him. after his outburst, you felt like all of the energy in your body had been taken away from you and retreated to bed early. you cried on and off for hours.

-you always thought you had a clinging problem. it was an insecurity you carried with you starting from childhood. friends would become acquaintances and family would keep you at arms-length. after years of believing the issue was you, simon walked into your life and told you different.

-if you stopped talking because you thought he stopped listening and was uninterested, he'd always turn back to you and genuinely ask why you stopped talking. whenever you apologized for hugging him for too long or asking to spend time with him for the third time that week, he'd always tilt his head at you and say in that low, sincere voice, "but i love you?"

-for all those reasons, you tried to give him the benefit of the doubt despite how much he hurt you. so, when he tries to bring it up the next morning, you do your best to brush it off. he was having a bad day. that was all. no need to make a fuss.

-"listen, love," he calls to you as you pop your piece of toast out of the toaster. "about last night-"

-completely disregarding his words, you look at the clock and stuff your phone into your pocket. "it's fine. honestly, simon," you tell him with the best smile you could muster. "i'm gonna be late. i'll see you tonight."

-you were so adamant on getting out as quick as possible that simon had no time to respond. he thought to himself that maybe he was making a bigger deal out of it than you. maybe there were no hard feelings and you were completely fine. after all, he was always overly worried for you, anyway.

-so, when you came home, he didn't mention it. it was as if last night didn't happen, and the two of you were perfectly fine. there were times where simon thought you were being a bit more restrained in your movements or words, but he tried to chalk it up to just him being overly paranoid. you said it was fine, so it was better not to push you on it, right?

-at first, you were doing really good at keeping yourself from overthinking the situation. however, as time went on and you paid more attention to how you acted around your boyfriend, you began to wonder if you were really that clingy.

-as the week progressed, your state of mind would deteriorate. what if it wasn't just a bad day? what if that was what he thought the entire time and was just waiting for the right moment to tell you? had he just been trying to cheer you up about your insecurities the entire time? and if he was, how much of this relationship was even real, then?

-the more you thought about it, the more distant you became. the last thing you wanted to do was make simon feel like he was being suffocated by you. you slowly stopped initiating physical affection with him, restricted talking about your day to a few sentences, and tried to answer simon's questions in one word when possible.

-he notices. of course he notices, it was like a stranger was living where you were supposed to be, and he missed it. he missed you.

-he asks you about your change when you're getting ready for bed, pulling the rest of your nightshirt over your head. despite being exhausted from work and looking like you were sitting out in the wind, he thought you never looked more ethereal than you did now.

-"(y/n)," he said.

-"hm?" you hummed to him, not turning toward his direction. you sat down on the edge of your side of the bed, turning off the lamp at the same time.

-your lack of emotional presence was starting to eat at him. he sat down next to you, the mattress dipping beneath his weight and forcing you to lean toward him.

-"you alright?"

-"yes. why?"

-"i dunno, you just seem..." his eyes tried to find yours, but you couldn't bring yourself to meet his gaze. "quiet."

-it was then that you looked at him, and it was scary to simon because he couldn't make out the emotion in your expression. there was nothing he could read.

-"isn't that-" you had to pause to try and stabilize your wavering voice. "isn't that what you wanted?"

-there was a tension-filled silence that settled in the room, and for a second you were worried that what you said was somehow incredibly offensive.

-finally, he chokes out, "i'm sorry."

-again, you try to muster up a smile. "it's fine, i already told you. i should've known you wanted space."

-"no."

-"no?"

-"it was my fault," he explains. "how could you 'ave known? i didn't tell you i wasn't in the mood that day, and that's not even considering the way i talked to you. i shouldn't have- nothing excuses what i said to you."

-still, you were convinced you were to blame. "well, i have a history of being clingy, so," you were trying to come up with more excuses for him. for most of your life, you had decided that you were the issue. it couldn't be any other way, right?

-"i know. it's one of the things i love you for," he says quietly. "not to sound cheesy but it's what makes you you, and i don't want you to lose that jus' 'cause i'm still shitty at communication."

-you knew in some capacity he was right. there was no excuse for how he talked to you, but the next words you wanted to say evaded you.

-simon thought about talking some more. instead, he grasped your back with one hand and slid his other underneath your legs, repositioning you on his lap. it was like a silent plea from him, a way of proving that he wanted to be close to you just as much as you wanted to be close to him.

-"you're sure i'm not too clingy?" you ask tentatively.

-"positive," he reassures you, rubbing small circles on your back with his thumb. "you wanna know something?"

-"what?"

-"if i wasn't so fucked up-"

-"you're not fucked up."

-"right." you never let him talk badly about himself. that was something he was still getting used to after all this time. being loved and learning to love himself. "well, if i didn't grow up the way i did and became the person i am, i'd probably be way clingier than you."

-"that's impossible," you deny, unconsciously letting yourself lean into his touch.

-"you don't know how much i want you. if my mind and body would let me, i'd be close to you all the time, showing you the attention you deserve."

-"you give me plenty."

-"agree to disagree," he stops with the circles and pulls you impossibly closer to his body. "but 'm trying. 'm trying to learn to let you love me and to not be afraid to love you. 'm sorry, love. i stopped trying that night, and i think it'll be the death of me."

-you let his words sink in, a thoughtful look on your face.

-"next time you'll tell me, right? what you're thinking?"

-"pinkie promise," he agrees, letting the hand under your legs slide out and raise his pinkie finger toward you.

-in return, you link your pinkie with his to seal the promise, and it feels as though the heavy tension in the air has cleared away.

-"i love you," he says, feeling bold from his previous admission.

-"i love you, too." there's that smile on your face. he never realized until now how he probably couldn't live without it.

-he kisses you on the lips, and for a moment the two of you just stay there in each other's arms, forgiving the past, healing the present, and dreaming of the future together.

[ram-bles]

a crumb of nsfw daisuke?

daisuke x reader | headcanons

requests/inbox: open

[ 🔞 minors dni ]

woah. from sweet to spicy. ill give this a try!

wrote this on mobile, sorry for the fuckass formatting.

gender neutral reader. sillies. lots of sillies. weed mention (like once).

🌺 c'mon, he somehow sneaked in some of his secret stash'a magazines. he's still a guy after all.

"Dai?" "Yeah?" He's busy on his Gameboy, but he acknowledges you, tilting his body to show his face but his eyes were glued to the screen. "Did you steal these porn mags from Jimmy or someth—" A pink blur suddenly pushes you away, using his feet to kick it back under his bed. "DUDE. PRIVACY. C'MON NOW."

🌺 You've probably caught him once or twice even before you two were a thing. It wasn't hard to, after all, you both shared a room.

Too lost in the sauce to even notice you, so you had to clear your throat. You've never seen someone so shocked to the point he doesn't know whether to shove his dick back in his pants, hide under the blankets, or try to do both at the same time but completely failing. He's stuttering your name out along with strings of apologies. Don't get your dick caught in your zipper now, Daisuke. "I didn't know you were there! Shitshitshit- I'm so so sorry- Aghhhh." He felt pathetic, whining in embarrassment. Daisuke ends up just pulling the blanket over the entirety of him. "You could've just asked me for help, y'know." He stares at you, scandalized as if he wasn't rubbing one off just moments ago. "How the fuck was I s'posed to know?!" You shrug, amused. "Dunno." "Man, fuck youuuu." "Happily." "Get over here already, please!"

🌺 Outside internship though? Weed before sex seems like something he'd do. I can't explain why.

🌺 Feeling his rings on you... in many ways.

🌺 Pretty sure we all agree that he's into praising. Both giving and receiving.

🌺 You know he's having lots of fun when the pitch of his voice goes high. Squeaking, voice cracking, whining.

🌺 Speaking of how vocal he is, he's probably loud too. But, since you're in the ship now, he'll try his best to keep it down, either on the pillow or you. He'll also be rambling about random things just so he doesn't finish early.

🌺 Dirty talking? ❌ He'll be cringing like there's no tomorrow. He'll make a discord (or whatever equivalent) kitten joke about it if he does.

🌺 Unintentional dirty talking though... That's another story. Or should I rephrase, more-so leaning towards cussing.

"Fuck— you're sosososo pretty..." His hands were pressing the back of your knees, folding and spreading your legs for him. He whines your name out, resting his length on your abdomen while he impatiently waits for your permission. "C'mon, pretty. I'll be this deep inside you." - "Feels good. Feels so good." He's panting and rutting into you like a dog. "You should- nh- loosen up a little- shit- if you get any tighter I think I'll cum..."

🌺 Quickies galore. Sure, it's less risky, but with his libido? Anyways, he's pretty easy to please anyways. A round or two would probably be enough for him.

🌺 Wearing his clothes while at it? Mega turn on for him.

🌺 Well, yes his libido is high, but you still need to be straightforward with him. He can't take hints...

"Want head?" "?!? Who's head?!" "YOUR DICK." "YOU'RE CUTTING IT OFF?" "WHAT? NO, I MEANT SUCKING YOUR—" "Good morning to you both too." "CAPTAIN?"

🌺 He loves giving and receiving hickeys. You would have to remind him everytime not to mark too high on your neck.

🌺 His aftercare involves lots of cuddling and lots of smooching.

🌺 Ending with a silly note. The first time you've done it with him, he ended up saying thank you since he didn't know what to do.

[subbmissivesuccubus]

Watch your mouth

Ya'll fucking with fear play?

~~~~~

"Fuck you."

the words left your mouth without even realizing, an instinctual curse as a response to your boyfriend finally- finally- sinking his cock inside you. He was torturing you this whole time; hours spent between your legs where he edged you over and over again, driving you crazy with his skilled fingers and tongue. He ignored your countless pleas to just fuck you already, having a lot more fun devolving you into a blubbering mess. So when he finally pushed his length inside your dripping, stretched out cunt, you gasped out a curse that was more meant to convey your satisfaction but of course, that's not what he interpreted from it.

"What was that?"

"Nothing- nothing- sorry-"

"Did you just curse at me?"

"Nononono- I didn't- I didn't-"

"No? Really? Because it sounded to me like you said 'go fuck yourself'. Was I wrong?"

"Nono- I wasn't serious- I couldn't control it- Please- I didn't mean-"

Uzui clicked his tongue at your babbles and whimpers, your words getting lost among your ramblings.

"Five. Four. Three-"

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean it- I didn't mean it!" you whined, your heart leaping in your throat at the countdown, your instincts immediately taking over in fear of him reaching one.

"So you did curse at me."

"I did b-but it was an accident! I promise- I didn't mean to say it."

"I bet it was cause I know you're not that fucking stupid that you think cursing me out is a good idea. What were you even thinking?"

"I wasn't- I wasn't thinking Daddy. I'm sorry! Please- please-"

"Where's your hairbrush?"

"Daddy- please!" you babbled, heart jumping up to your throat at the implication, your behind already stinging just from the idea of what he was going to do to it, "I'll be good. I'll be so good for you Daddy please- please don't spank me!"

"If you're going to be good for me, you have to prove it. Now tell me where it is before you piss me off even more."

Rengoku tilted his head like a dog confused, his lower lip jutting out in a pout, eyebrows furrowed like he was about to cry even as he pushed his whole cock inside you, inches burying deep in your weeping cunt.

"Why would you curse at me, my love? That really hurt my feelings..."

"Sorry- i'm sorry- I didn't mean it- hah-"

"No? You didn't mean it?" he asked, hissing as your cunt throbbed around his shaft, squeezing him tightly as his heavy balls pressed against you, "Then why did you say it? Don't you know your words have meaning?"

"I know- i'm sorry- it was instinct!" you cried out, whimpering as he stayed completely still inside of you, his body pressed against yours, rendering you unmovable underneath his weight.

"You wanna show me how sorry you are?"   "Y-Yes- okay-" "Yeah? Then we're going to stay like this." "W-What?"

"Yeah~" he cooed, tickling your nose with his own, "You're going to cockwarm me for as long as I want. If you're really sorry, you'll do this for me, right?"

Sanemi gripped your face harshly, growling as he squished your cheeks between his fingers, forcing a silly pout on your face.

"Do you think I’m stupid?" he warned, grip unwavering at your whimpers,

"No- no- sorry- I didn't mean to Daddy!"

"Fucking brat. Just when I was going to take pity on you- you cuss me out?"

He ignored your continued apologies as his free hand went down to your ankle to grab at your panties that was still dangling off of it. Bunching it into a ball, he roughly shoved it into your mouth, muffling your squeals as you tasted your own essence, the fabric soaking up the remaining saliva in your mouth. He then flipped you over, a hand on the back of your head before pushing your face down on the mattress harshly.

You gasped against your panties as he pressed his cock against your entrance, the heat of his fat tip kissing your pussy making your eyes roll to the back of your head. Fuck. You were in for a night.

"You know, I was going to be nice." he said, gripping the base of his cock before he started to push inside you again, "Make love to you for being so good for me. Too bad. That's off the table now."

Gyomei pressed a heavy hand onto your chest, pressing down gently and that was enough to get you to stop talking.

"You know I don't like it when you lie. And you know I don't like it when you curse."

"It-It was instinct- no like- not instinct but-" you whimpered, "I didn't mean it Sir, I promise!"

"I don't care. You never curse at me. Understand?"

"I know. I'm sorry. I'm sorry Sir."

"Why have I told you not to curse?"

You sniffled, thinking back to your training- "B-Because I'm a strong and intelligent w-woman and I don't need to use b-bad words to- hah- to make my point."

"Good girl. I'm glad you remember. But we're stopping here."

"No- please- please- don't stop-"

He pressed down on your chest more, making you whimper as you bit back your words. He always knows how to render you speechless with just a touch. With just a word.

"You need to learn. You're going to suck me off and once I cum down your throat, we're going to bed. You'll be lucky if I decide to touch you tomorrow. Now, get on your knees."

Obanai raised an eyebrow, clearly not impressed by your whines and whimpers of apologies as he brought a hand up and wrapped his fingers around your neck. You gasped, air getting caught in your pipe as he choked you, fingers gripped you tightly from the sides.

"Since you can't control your potty mouth, maybe you don't need to speak at all." your boyfriend said, tightening his grip on your neck as he pushed back inside of you, walls parting for his meaty cock. You grit your teeth, mouth opening in a pathetic attempt to moan but you just felt lightheaded, your man giving you just enough to keep breathing but not enough to speak or gasp.

"That's better, isn't it?" he asked rhetorically, looking down at you with a dark look in his eyes, "Dumb little thing like you doesn't need to use words. Especially since you can't think before you speak."

He knew you could take it as you were a formidable Hashira yourself- a bit of choking wasn't going to really hurt you but you could feel his cock grow harder inside you as you struggled, gurgling nonsense as your eyes filled with tears, overtaken by the various sensations.

"S-Sor- I- Sorr-"

"Yeah, yeah. Just shut up and take my cock."

Giyuu clicked his tongue as he took his cock away from your cunt, ignoring your cries of protest. He stroked himself once before he started to crawl up, pinning your body down as he did. Eventually, he reached your chest, giving a nipple a harsh pinch and a twist to make you control yourself, unable to focus on babbling apologies as you had to focus on the pleasurable pain.

"Are you done?" he asked coldly, referring to your cries. You nodded quickly, gasping as he let go of your tit. "Good." he said before crawling up some more. You stayed still, obediently waiting as he straddled your face, knees on either side of your head as he towered over you.

"Open."

You obeyed, opening your mouth wide. He not so gently started sliding his cock into you, able to taste a little bit of your own juices as he did. While he'd usually take it slow, now he pushed in inch after inch, not stopping even as he hit the back of your throat.

You gagged around him, eyes starting to water as he mercilessly drove his dick into your mouth, his thick member sliding down your throat. Your legs kicked up and down as he stuffed himself balls deep, the tuft of hair on the base of his cock tickling your nose. You tired your best to breathe, blood rushing to your face, making you dizzy.

He rolled his hips against your face, a whisper of a laugh leaving his lips before he started to move, thrusting his hips back and forth, making you gag and choke as he started fucking your face.

"Since I don't have soap to wash your mouth out, my cum will have to do."

~~~~~

[spookyji]

animal crossing date to needy kai. nsfw + mdni

so i thought abt this and then:

cockwarming kai while on an animal crossing date, sitting in his gaming chair, his thick thighs resting beneath yours as you shift a little, tummy full of his massive cock, soaked panties pushed to the side as your wet arousal drips down the base of his length,, and kai can barely focus on your date, staring at his monitor and trying to resist the urge to shove your hips down nd fuck your cute cunt ‘til it’s swollen and stuffed with his load,, fingers gripping his controller like it’s his sanity every time you shift a little,, your eyes trained on your handheld switch, rambling about your island, villagers, and your hundreds of thousands of interest free debt to a dad raccoon.

and kai has been as patient as he can be. until somewhere between filling an inventory with of hundreds of turnips and fossils and selling said inventory,. it’s too much to bear. whining in surprise when kai thrusts up into your cunt, mumbling apologies as he kisses up your neck, fingers slipping easily under the hoodie of his you’re wearing, grasping at the soft plush of your tummy, groaning as he feels his bulge, buried deep inside of you. and in seconds animal crossing debts are forgotten,, and it’s kai pounding you into his desk <3

ah fuck,, so tight f’ me, kai moans, all blushy like he’s not thrusting into you a little too fast, hoodie shoved up nd your cute tits pressed into his desk, clinging to the smooth surface as you cry out, gonna let him use your pussy for himself? loud slaps of skin on skin, lewd squelches of your cunt sucking him in, wet arousal soaking his cock as your pussy drools for him, manhandled into a cute cum dump now,, wanting to let him use you like a tight hole~ and kai finishes a little quick,, stuffing you full of his heavy load before you know it, white ring forming around the base of his cock as he fucks his cum into your cunt,, warmth spreading as a full feeling settles in your tummy, ‘m sorry, couldn’t help it,, ruined our date, kai mumbles,, consider your animal crossing date abandoned for round two?

a reminder to definitely not cockwarm kai because it’s never just cockwarming

[kurooh]

INTERRUPTED ! — JUJUTSU KAISEN

⊹₊˚. he hates it when someone (or something) interrupts his time with you.

⟡ feat. gojo satoru, kento nanami, fushiguro toji, kamo choso.

⟡ warnings: 18+ content (mdni), modern au, roommates! satosugu in gojo’s, stupidity, phone calls, being walked in on, oral [m&f]. not proofread

⟡ xoxo juno: first time writing for jjk.. i’m nervous about the characterizations; i’ll write more characters for hcs if i get reqs. rbs are loved !!

— GOJO SATORU.

“t-toru, that’s perfect, faster please,” you plea, tangling your fingers in his snowy hair and pressing his head closer to your dripping pussy. gojo lets you, whining a little as he scissors his fingers in and out of you and licks at your clit.

you inhale sharply, back bowing right off the bed; a large hand spreads your thighs impossibly wider and press them into the duvet beneath you.

“oh, i’m gonna cum,” you whine, hips jerking towards his fingers desperately. bright blue eyes latch onto yours, and he’s about to watch you fall apart when—

“yo, satoru!” your boyfriend’s roommate, geto, calls breezily from behind the door. before either of you can respond, the door opens and he strides in, looking at his phone. “what do you want for dinner tonight? i’m going to head out to go shopping and—” he looks up, and a pillow nails him right in the face.

“get out, suguru!” gojo yells, covering you with part of the duvet.

geto laughs awkwardly, a blush blooming across his face, and he apologizes quickly before stepping out and closing the door.

“also!” gojo calls, facing the door as he sits down beside you, “tonkotsu for dinner tonight!”

— NANAMI KENTO.

“fuuuck,” kento groans lowly, pressing your head further into his pelvis, his cock sliding down your throat. blond strands fan out around his head as it drops back onto the couch cushions behind him, his eyes fluttering shut.

your soft hands stroke the parts of his cock you can’t fit in your mouth, wet sounds mingling with your choking and filling the room. “angel,” he sighs, fingers soothingly rubbing against your scalp, “this is perfect, i love it when you—”

a familiar ringtone cuts his sentence off, and his face twists in aggravation as he lifts his hips, fishing his phone out of his back pocket with his free hand.

“i’m sorry. it’s ijichi.” kento answers the phone, his cock starting to soften in your mouth.

your eyes meet his as you mischievously slide off the length of his cock, your lips gently suctioned around his tip. kento sits up, his eyes widening, and he’s about to mouth something to you when you slam all the way down, placing your hands on his thighs for support.

he gasps sharply, nearly letting out a moan; he reassures ijichi, who sounds worried.

“oh, yes i’m alright. something nearly fell off my shelf is all..” his voice drifts off and his eyes become lidded, his cock hard enough to cut diamonds.

a heat rushes through your body, and you clench your thighs, removing a hand from his own. you fingers slip into your panties, rubbing at your clit as you look up at him, mouth full. on the phone, ijichi rambles on frantically about something that’s probably not even important, and kento bites his lip, slamming you down hard.

the sudden movement and force of his tip plowing into the back of your throat has you choking, pussy clenching as tears build in your eyes. he looks at you, hearts practically in his eyes, and moves the phone as far as he can from him.

“please, angel— make me cum, just like you always do.”

— FUSHIGURO TOJI.

“you like bein’ fucked like this, huh?” toji grunts, his breath coming out in hard pants, warmth fanning over your face. moaning, and desperately attempting to feel him deeper, you spread your legs impossibly wider.

“yes, toji!” you whimper, hands running down his muscled back; your nails bite crescent moons into the sweaty skin before they rake down his back as your eyes roll back into your head. “a-ah, i want you to fill me up, please—”

“don’t worry doll,” toji murmurs, beads of sweat rolling down his temple as he fucks into you much harder and unforgiving than earlier. “i-i’m gonna fuckin’ stuff you until you can’t breathe. gonna take it all like a good girl, yeah?”

you nod eagerly, eyes shining with tears while your pussy clamps down on his thick cock. he can barely breathe when you’re like this, so pretty and pliant and willing beneath him, taking his cock greedily. your tits bounce, smacking against each other due to the force of his thrusts; he palms at your ass with a large hand of his, squeezing the plush skin before slapping it.

toji can’t wait to fuck all his cum back into you.

“baby, i’m gonna fuckin’ cum—SHIT!”

his face contorts in pain, the cum rushing back down into his balls, and before you can even register what’s happening he’s pulling back and choking out curses.

“what happened, toji?” you’re at his side immediately, rubbing at his back soothingly before he pushes you away, clearly embarrassed and unhappy.

“fuckin’ hamstring cramp, god damn it.”

he rubs at the back of his thigh angrily, his cock deflating between his legs as he grunts out something scathing below his breath.

“i’m fine,” he hisses, punching the back of his leg before finally laying on his back. “fuck, i don’t know where that shit came from.”

“well, you’re getting to that age..” you tease lightly, a smile splitting your lips when he glares at you, hard, and roughly yanks you between his legs, raising them both carefully, for fear of another debilitating cramp. his half hard cock rests against his pelvis, and you stare at it briefly before he pushes you towards it.

“let’s hope you don’t have any more old man cramps, toji.” you stick your tongue out at him before leaning your head towards his tip.

“you better shut that mouth before i fill it for you, princess.”

— KAMO CHOSO.

“o-oh, fuck,” choso heaves from beneath you, his jaw slack with drool trailing down as he watches you ride his cock. the ripple of the muscle beneath the plush skin of your thighs and the soft bounce of your tits always leaves him stuttering and unable to look away from you.

“you like it, baby? want me to go a little faster?” your voice is sweet and soft as your small hands press into the muscle of his pecs for balance.

“mm mm, this is perfect..” he sighs, his back arching uncontrollably as you slowly slide upwards, leaving his tip inside you. then you sit all the way back down, shivering. “are you getting tired?”

“a little,” you smile, giggling softly as he places his hands on your hips. your voice promptly breaks into a whimper when he starts to thrust upwards, erratic and strong as his cock stretches you out and fills you up.

close to going dumb on his cock, you gasp, fingers reaching up to pinch and tweak your nipples for extra pleasure.

“c-choso, right there,” you choke out helplessly, pressure building inside you, all over and racing through each limb.

he finds himself gasping after a particularly rough drag of his cock against your ridged walls, leaving him thickening and throbbing inside you. the room fills with the heavy sound of skin smacking against skin, choso’s deep groans, and your whiny moans.

“so good, s-so good,” he mumbles, back bowing off the bed. strands of his dark brown hair are damp with sweat and sticking to his forehead and temples, the rest bouncing against his head and the pillow as he fucks you.

your mouth opens in a plea, eyes half lidded; but you snap your mouth shut and your eyes widen in some kind of panic that has him sitting up, the mood practically ruined. choso’s about to ask what went wrong when he hears a loud pounding at the door and a whiny voice calling for him.

“chosoooo!” the voice is unmistakably yūji’s, and his knocks only grow louder and rougher. “you comin’ out here or what? you’ve been gone for a while and everyone’s looking for you!”

oh, right. the party that he and yūji were hosting at their shared apartment, which is full of their closest friends and the sound of happy voices downstairs.

“i’ll be downstairs in a bit,” choso fights against the urge to snap at him, “five minutes, okay?”

“alright,” yūji finally calls back, sounding disappointed as he stops knocking and leaves you and his brother in bed together.

your eyes widen as he slowly lifts himself out of bed, clearly disappointed but gritting his teeth through it nonetheless. he pulls at the hair bands on his wrists, tying his hair into its usual spiky buns on either side of his head.

“cho!” you gasp, thighs clenching, “we’re not gonna finish up?”

“can’t,” he huffs, rubbing a hand over his face as he makes himself accept it. “we need to go downstairs, we’ve been gone for far too long.”

“i-i was gonna cum,” you whine, peeling yourself away from the bed against your will. tears form in your eyes in absolute frustration. “please don’t do this..”

he sighs before he leans in to kiss you hard. he looks at you, his face flushed and clearly just as unhappy as you are, though his feelings are hidden. “later, when everyone’s gone, i promise i’ll make you cum again and again.. you’ll be begging for me to stop, crying and shaking.”

your face heats quickly, and you look towards him happily, eagerly anticipating later.

with a sexy little laugh, he asks, “does that sound good, baby?”